Occasionally (very occasionally) other people/entities are foolish enough to publish some of my work. It’s probably done out of pity, but at least it’s done, which is why you don’t hear the homeless guy complaining when you flip him a quarter.
Here are just a few (a.k.a., “all”) of the glittering literary (glitterary?) gems that have caught the eyes of innumerable outside publications since late 2006, when I first began to act on this masochistic craving for outright rejection and abject humiliation at the hands of perfect strangers.
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3/29/11 – Things I’ve Learned from Rap Songs Over the Last Decade
12/7/10 – A Note from My High School English Teacher to My Parents Regarding My Letter to Penthouse
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1/13/11 – R.I.P.
8/25/10 – My Wife Isn’t Crazy About Our New Home Security System
6/9/10 – Welcome to Grizzly World
11/4/09 – A Review of Some of the Less Heralded Apple Products Debuting During Steve Jobs’ Leave of Absence
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1/4/10 – My PDA is Prone to PDA
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06/02/09 – Friday Doorbuster Specials at the Dollar Store
01/21/09 – My Wife—A Former Speechwriter in the Bush Administration—Reflects on the State of Our Union
04/07/08 – Excerpts from Amelia Bedelia Joins CTU
07/05/07 – Rejected Submissions to Mother Goose’s New and Improved Anthology of Children’s Nursery Rhymes
12/06/06 – One Amateur Writer’s In-Depth Analysis of a First Grader’s Creative Writing Exercise
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11/30/09 – Jump n’ Jivin’, Jump-in Divin’
6/14/09 – Tonight, Tonight, the World is Wild and Bright
6/6/09 – I Know a Boat You Can Get On
6/2/09 – I Want to Go Back to San Juan
4/4/09 – Struggling to Pass a Pop Quiznos
3/23/09 – The Straw that Broke the Writer’s Sink
3/5/09 – The Kitty that Never Sleeps
1/26/09 – It’s Not Easy Being Green – at Christmas, anyway
12/07/07 – It’s Beginning to Look a lot Like Death
10/12/07 – Trevor vs. the Real World: I’ve Never Been So Moved
04/12/07 – Trevor vs. the Real World: Easter Edition
02/08/07 – Trevor vs. the Real World: Cadillac Woes
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[regrettably defunct]
2/21/10 – Actually…
The Mother Goose rejects are wonderful.