Twit in the Kisser
- Myles full of smiles when Chase is on the case! #tdaycbs https://t.co/mJdID0CCgu 4 months ago
- There's nothing in this world that makes a human male feel marginally more competent than erecting a tent in his backyard. #tentsandpurposes 2 years ago
- "Or your face, because it's hard to get off!" ~ Marabella, 3, contributing to a list of things that you shouldn't feed to doggies 2 years ago
- "I put frosting on the donut. You know why? To make them more chocolatey." ~ Marabella, Age 3, Certified Genius #gonutsfordonuts 3 years ago
- Daughter (almost 3): Daddy, I'm growing a beard. Me: Oh? Did you just start. I don't see any hair. D(a3): No, I'm growing it in my garden. 3 years ago
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Welcome to Write in the Kisser, a modern-day web log (or "weg," as I believe the kids are calling it) that has been generously described as "yet another collection of essays, quips, rants, puns, insights, observations, and other linguistical lunacy that the Internet would be better off without."
Unfortunately, this generous description comes from me. I can't even print what everyone else is saying.
Author Archives: hawaiianpun
MSN Is Overly Optimistic About How Carefully Its Audience Reads
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The Sperminator and the Poor-man Hater
In case you haven’t heard, Arnold Schwarzenegger has just copped to a love-child that he fathered with a member of the help, while Donald “The Donald” Trump is not running for president. In honor of this non news, here is … Continue reading
See you on Broadway
I’ve got a great new idea for a Broadway production entitled Intermission. The idea is, the audience shows up, stares at empty stage for an hour, then watches 10 minutes of performances before enjoying another hour of curtain gazing. Or … Continue reading
Posted in That's a Musing
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I Heart You Mom
In honor of Mother’s Day: Ten points for anyone who can guess what the hell body part this is tattooed on. (I don’t know the answer, by the way. And I don’t think I want to…)
American Expressed
Got a piece of mail from American Express yesterday. As usual, I ripped it open without paying too much attention to the envelope itself. However, as I was about to recycle it, I noticed the following message: Just in case … Continue reading
Posted in BOING!
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Obama mama drama. I mean, daddy drama.
So Pres. Obama finally released his long-form birth certificate (PDF) today. Now, first of all, did you know that he’s actually Barack Hussein Obama the second??? Because I don’t think I realized that, and that makes me wonder: If Pres. Obama’s father — the … Continue reading
Less Successful Hip-Hop and R&B Acts
Boyz II Men’s Rooms Kool & the Gangrene Salt-N-Vinega Earth, Wind, & Fred Keith Sweatpants Naughty by Nurture Mary J. Bilge Diana Kübler-Ross Hi-C and Ho Hos Run DeLorean Motor Company Poindexter Sisters Sister Sludge The Commodore 64s
