Nielsen: Dead and (I’m Not) Loving It

A moment of deadpan silence for one of history’s greatest straight-faced comedic actors: Leslie William Nielsen (1926-2010).

I vant to spoof your crud!

Some final laughs from the white-haired humorist:

  • “It’s the same old story. Boy finds girl, boy loses girl, girl finds boy, boy forgets girl, boy remembers girl, girl dies in a tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year’s Day.”
    “Goodyear? ”
    “No, the worst.”
  • “You’d better tell the Captain we’ve got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital.”
    “A hospital? What is it?”
    “It’s a big building with patients, but that’s not important right now.”
  • “Now, Jane, what can you tell us about the man you saw last night?”
    “He’s Caucasian.”
    “Caucasian?”
    “Yeah, you know, a white guy. A moustache. About six-foot-three.”
    “Awfully big moustache.”
  • “Captain, how soon can you land?”
    “I can’t tell.”
    “You can tell me. I’m a doctor.”
  • “I’m single! I love being single! I haven’t had this much sex since I was a Boy Scout leader!
    — I mean at the time I was dating a lot.”
  • “I don’t recall your name on the guest list.”
    “That’s OK. I sometimes go by my maiden name.”

And, of course:

  • “Can you fly this plane, and land it?”
    “Surely you can’t be serious!”
    “I am serious. And don’t call me Shirley.”

R.I.P. sir. (Rest in Parody)

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2 Responses to Nielsen: Dead and (I’m Not) Loving It

  1. dsizzle says:

    No one could deliver those types of jokes like he could. I think “Dracula Dead and Loving It” actually introduced me to humor (I literally didn’t smile until 1995.)

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