Kentucky Pervy

The ever-vigilant Guardian shares some exciting news from the Outback detailing a plan for the Gold Coast’s first ever bikini race, which organizers hope will become an annual event. As you might expect, the contest will feature both racing and bikinis — though it’s anyone’s guess as to what the bigger draw will be.

Adding to the allure is the fact that competitors will actually challenge one another on a regulation horse-racing track. They will even be locked inside barrier stalls before the starting gun goes off to ensure that no one gets an unfair boob start. Wistful wags can only wonder at the wanton wordplay that this concept might have inspired had it involved bikini-clad beauties competing on a dog-racing track.

Lost opportunities to refer to women as “bitches” aside, this competition is sure to be a big success with its target audience. It’s also sure to give new meaning to the phrase “enjoying yourself down under.” Let’s just hope that, at the end of the day, nobody ends up lost in the bush…

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