So maybe Dean Martin’s rolling over in his grave right now, but the guy in this story is lucky he can even roll over in his bed. After all, when you’re the subject of a headline like Train drags half-naked mooner along tracks and are still alive to be mortified about it, you better sink to your knees (slowly…so slowly) every night and thank Loki that he thought your buttocks-baring behind was worth saving (more or less).
I guess you’ll live to de-pants another day, kid. Butt — er, but — maybe lay off the moonshine, mmkay? Cheeky bastard.