Yo Yo Momma

Good news professional Dis Jockeys and wannabe Suburban Outfitters! I, Trevor Bartholomew Marzipan, have just come up with an entire collection of original “Yo Momma” jokes. Now, I grant you, most of these aren’t very good — but only because they’re great.[1] So read on to see why the world of “Yo Momma” jokes is now a better place for yours truly having lived in it (however brief said residence may have been).

WARNING: Improper or untimely use of the “Yo Momma” joke has been known to cause nausea; dry mouth; diarrhea; constipation; an erection lasting 4-6 hours; dizziness; insomnia; narcolepsy; weight changes; anxiety/agitation; invisibility; plague; funny accents; ear hair; acne; backne; trick knee; head, shoulders, knees, AND toes; a case of the howling fantods; and Big Foot. Also, you might get punched in the nose, but that one’s not our fault.


  • Yo momma’s ass is so big, she doesn’t have panty lines — she has panty equators!
  • Yo momma’s teeth are so busted, during the month of October she works full-time as a Jack-o’-Lantern!
  • Yo momma’s so ugly, when she goes to the fish market they wrap her up in newspaper!
  • Yo momma’s so heinously unpleasant, when she took out a personal ad in the paper, it took it back!
  • Yo momma’s breath is so bad, her teeth committed suicide!
  • Yo momma’s so unfamiliar with ornithology, when your daddy told her he saw some titmice in the yard last week she began setting mousetraps in her bra!
  • Yo momma’s voice is so grating she uses it to make nachos!
  • Yo momma’s so ignorant of political terminology, every time she gives a stump speech, she cuts down a tree!
  • Yo momma’s so stupid, she voted for George W. Bush! —Twice! —In this election!
  • Yo momma’s so absurdly and improbably imperfect in every way, she was almost certainly the original inspiration for the “yo momma” joke!


  • Yo momma’s such a slut, she doesn’t stuff the turkey on Thanksgiving — the turkey stuffs her!


Got an original “Yo Momma” joke of your own? Feel free to share it in the comments section. If it’s any good, I may just post it here for all the world[2] to see! Or I may just feel an overwhelming sense of inadequacy and self-loathing. Either way, you’re bound to feel better about yourself at someone else’s expense!

[1] See what I did there? No? Tony the Tiger did. Now don’t you feel stupid.
[2] A.k.a., “my girlfriend.”


Add to FacebookAdd to DiggAdd to Del.icio.usAdd to StumbleuponAdd to RedditAdd to BlinklistAdd to Ma.gnoliaAdd to TechnoratiAdd to FurlAdd to Newsvine

This entry was posted in Short Form Flobbityjoop and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to Yo Yo Momma

  1. evan johnson says:

    You forgot one of the side effects – compulsive gambling…

    I actually heard that one on a commercial! One of the side effects was gambling!? I wish I could remember what drug it was for.

    – Evan

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s